Great Escape III - The Rear Endings

Alright, after much delays in production and a commercial break, I have finally resumed work on the final episode of the Great Escape series. This one is named The Rear Endings because it involves a couple of rear end collisions.
Very long post alert!


The first one was on a Friday morning in October 2005. I was driving my Corolla jejeli around 7am. I was traveling on city roads trying to make my way to the highway for the 40 minute drive to work. I was on a 2 lane road and was coming up on an crossroad that allowed people leaving their subdivisions to merge on the city road. A car pulled up into the median and stayed there, probably waiting for me to pass so the car could get in behind me. At the time the driver pulled into the median, I was still far away and the person could have merged before I got there without disturbing me but she didn't. Then I guess she thought about it and decided to get in before me, only issue was at this time I was closer and I would have to brake hard to avoid hitting her.

She pulled in and I started flashing my headlights to let the driver know she was pulling a crazy move and I slowed down to let her go but the driver now decided she was going to wait instead and she stopped. Although she wasn't in my lane yet, she had stuck the front end of her car in my lane. I couldn't pass without clearing the front of her car. I slammed my brakes and hit my horns. I wanted to cut into the right lane to avoid hitting her but there was a car pulling in that lane from the other side. I slammed my brakes harder and I was able to stop just before I got to her car and then screeeeeech! BANG!!! BANG!!!

WTF just happened? Someone just plowed into my from the back. Notice there are 2 bangs above. That's because when I got hit from the back, my car was pushed and I ended up hitting the woman that pulled in front of me. At first I was dazed, I was thinking what just happened. I pulled off the road and got out of my car. Obviously, I was missing my left front headlamp and my car sounded like I had a busted muffler or silencer. The car that hit me had a smashed up front. Well in the driver's seat of this car was this cute little chick (here we go again with them pretty young things - PYT).

We did the "are you okay" formalities and what not. The airbags in PYT's car deployed and I was worried for her more cause her car didn't look good at all. I called the police and then called my mum cause I was just like 5 minutes from home. The lady that pulled in front of me was Jamaican and she was just screaming bla bla bla saying I hit her and I did this. PYT and I were looking at her like, "bitch you pulled into the road and stopped". But here, you hit someone from the back, it's your fault. PYT got a ticket and her insurance fixed my car and all. The Jamaican idiot? I don't know what happened her. I wanted her to get a ticket so bad but the cop let her off. I didn't suffer any injuries though and I still went to work with my car making the loudest noise it could make. My boss sent me back home though and my car was fixed within 10 days.



PART 2

January 26, 2006, 1pm.

I had just left work and I was supposed to go to my girlfriend's (now ex) place for some afternoon rendezvous *wink* before I go to school later in the evening. I was actually on the phone with my girl when the crash happened.


There's this junction on the highway where construction was going on. The road was narrow and they were expanding the road but construction meant an even narrower road so there was always slow traffic at this place except for this afternoon. It was strange. I was cruising along and I made the bend to turn to this narrow road and I saw there was no traffic. I was happy - more time for me to enjoy this afternoon. To give you a better view, the road slopes down, then climbs up to become a bridge for a little bit. I was driving my same Corolla, except this time I had done some custom jobs on it. I put custom chrome tail lights, chrome exhaust tip, halo projector headlamps (BMW style), new brakes, new shocks, new tires. It was a stick shift (manual) but I don't race. I speed when I need to but I DON'T race. Of course, people try to race me at lights and what not but I'm smarter than that.


There was a 2003 Corolla in front of me but there was plenty of distance between us. Well, on the bridge was a traffic jam but we couldn't see it because we're on the lower part of the slope. Cars got to the bridge and slowed down. The car in front of the corolla got to the bridge and slammed the brakes, the corolla behind it did the same. I saw the sudden stop and I hit my brakes also and I started hearing the screech. "Why is my car not stopping?" I tried again and it kept screeching, I was slowing down but I was sliding also, time for some quick thinking. I looked to my right thinking I could cut into that lane but there was a car there. There was an exit on the left, I checked my left to see if I could make the exit but there was a blue mazda 626 with a guy sitting in the passenger's side and he had his hand outside. If I cut left for the exit, I will not only hit the car, I will crush the dude's hand and I will probably crash into the median/divider. Then BAM!!! The deed had been done.

I looked up and saw my hood or bonnet all bent up. The airbags didn't deploy which meant I slowed down considerably since those things are supposed to fire at 20mph or higher (except I had a faulty sensor). I got out of the car, the lady got out too, did same "are you okay" formalities. Everyone was fine. Her car looked okay, her rear bumper was just scratched up but my car was messed up. Since it was a narrow road, we were blocking one lane. Traffic guy came and told us to go to a parking lot where a cop later met us. My car was still working though. I drove it home and to the repair shop after I got a ticket, grrrr! I later found out, my tires had less grip on the road because the road had been scraped so they could put a fresh layer of asphalt cause I didn't understand how new brakes, tires and shocks failed me. Of course I lost my custom jobs and till this day, my dad still thinks I was racing when the crash happened and I have never raced before but you have a guy with manual transmission and custom accessories - racer traits.

Well, at the repair shop, they claimed the frame of the car had been bent. Everything else can be fixed except for the frame. To the eye, you wouldn't know but ideal thing is once the frame is bent or damaged, junk it and that was what the repair shop and my insurance did - they sold it as junk. I'm sure the car is back on the streets now as a rebuilt car. Insurance paid me the value of the car though and I went and got a newer model Corolla. I no longer have that car either but it was not due to a crash.

Needless to say, I'm a safer driver now. I do a lot of defensive driving now. You want to overtake? Go! I keep my distance but of course the newer cars have better 'defense' mechanisms also that help. In summary, I just want to thank Baba God again that spared me in all of these crashes. I've seen cars on fire for similar things, people have broken bones, been ejected and killed for these same rear end collisions but I didn't suffer more than a headache.
So for all the great escapes, please give Baba loke 44000 gbosas for me.

Oh, I was playing with my ink blogging last night 'cause I drew some illustrations. I wasn't paying much attention though so I'll insert the drawings later.

Great Escape II - The Drowning

Disclaimer: I plan to vividly describe everything that happened and how it happened. This will be a long ass post and it will take some time to read. Hopefully, it will paint a very good picture and make you thank God again for me. Enjoy

Saturday May 21, 2005, around 6pm.

My now ex girlfriend's siblings decided to throw a pool party on this day with their parents out of town, nothing big, just some pool side fun. A bunch of people were there, the older crowd of the older siblings were on one side and we, the younger crowd were on another side. We were joined together by the pool and the food/drinks in the middle of the pool area. I don't drink conventional beer like them Heineken and stuff so I opted for Smirnoff Apple. I had one bottle, downed some barbecue chicken, I was feeling good. C'mon, it's just one bottle.

After some time, I was downing my second bottle of Smirnoff (some berry flavor this time around), I decided to enter the water. I chilled at the shallow end for a while, splashed some water, made some noise and then the devil decided it was his turn. A friend decided to walk to the deep end and he recruited me to follow and I did. We sat at the edge of the pool at the deep end for a bit, just talking and stuff and then he decided to go back to the shallow end. I said I would chill for a few more minutes. After a few minutes, I decided to go back to the shallow end. Now, I could have just stood up and and walk on the side or get in the pool and walk back along the side like I did before. But for some reason, my eyes caught a float in the middle of the deep end and I decided I had to get the float before I walk back to the shallow end. So, I jumped in the pool and proceeded to walk to the middle of the deep end.

Again, I couldn't swim (and I still can't swim). Also, the deep end was 6 ft deep and I'm 6ft 1 in height. I got halfway between the wall of the pool and the float and I realized my nose was not 6ft high off the ground, it was under water. At that point, I figured I'll jump up, catch a big mouthful of air, grab the float, land back in the water on my feet and then walk back to the wall and go the shallow end. Simple plan??? No, wrong move!!!


I jumped and took a deep breath as planned, I reached for the float but it was out of reach. Now I was coming down from the jump but instead of coming down straight, I guess the water being disturbed by everyone else pushed me a bit and I came down at an angle with my back facing the water. Realizing that I was going down into no man's land, I decided to yell so people can at least hear me and save me. Only thing was when I made that decision, I was already under and so my yell was muffled by the water. To make matters worse, the air I had taken in during my jump was being used up by my yelling. "What's happening?" I wondered. Yup, I was now officially under the water. I can't feel the ground under my feet and I can't seem to reach the wall and for some reason, everyone in the pool wasbeyond my reach. I raised my hand and I felt air. I started waving frantically, hoping someone would see my distress call. I even splashed water around but help was not coming. After a while, I decided to conserve my energy. I held my breath and tried to look around for something I can grab. I was ready to grab ass, boobs, anything at this point but although they seemed so close, they were far away. The air in my lungs started escaping. Second by second, my lungs were emptying out and then it happened.

Yup, my life flashed before me. "Is this how I die?" I saw the newspaper headline for the next week - 'Man dies in pool', I saw my mum at the hospital crying, I saw my dad being consoled, I saw the coffin, I saw my brother. I was seeing the future," this is how I die, I don't get to have a wedding or have kids, THIS IS HOW I DIE!". While all these were going on in my eyes (it wasn't in my mind or head, I was seeing it), I was still, I stopped moving. I originally stopped moving to see if I would float but when that wasn't working, reality set in. "It's a lie, I refuse to die this way and if this is how I die, I'm going out fighting". I decided to make the biggest raucous I could make in that water. I wanted to cause such an underwater disturbance that would attract attention. My reflexes took over - I took a breath involuntarily, water rushed in. I closed my mouth, held my nose with my hands. Nope, didn't stop reflex, I took another breath and gotmore water in my lungs. It didn't look good. I had to do something. It was time to fight.

So I started trashing around, flailing my hands and legs about. I had to cause a scene, someone had to see me struggling. Somebody, anybody, please, heeelllllppppp ....... . . . . . . . . . . . . . Then, it got quiet, very quiet. It was dark too, pitch black. I was out, underwater. Yup, I passed out, fainted, semi died while under the water with no one noticing anything.

Gasp, another gasp. I was hearing voices, kinda muffled though. I couldn't see. The voices became clearer: "who knows CPR?". Someone kept asking. "He's breathing", someone else said. I was beginning to see blurry images and I was still gasping for air. My lungs were hurting real bad. It was very painful taking those breaths but I needed it. I didn't know what was happening. I was laid on the floor next to the pool (or deck, whatever) face up, then I was turned over. A lot of people were looking at me, looking shocked. Then it hit me - I'M ALIVE!!! I SURVIVED!!!

I asked to lay for a bit and was then transferred to a pool chair. I kept gasping for about 5 mins and then I was able to breath normally, my lungs still hurt though. My sister was crying and I heard she was freaking out before I woke up, slapping me and hitting me to wake me up (only time she could have gotten away with it). She sat with me and refused to go back in the pool. I finally convinced her to go have fun. Then I asked someone what happened, how was I discovered? Apparently, when I passed out, I ended up floating face down. My friend that went to the deep end with me then saw me and was making a joke that I was swimming. When he called out for me and I refused to answer, he prodded me and I didn't respond. That was when he knew something was wrong and dragged me out. From the time that someone said he saw me waving in the water to when I pulled out was estimated to be about 3 minutes. It doesn't look like a long time but I believe that's about how long the human brain can go without oxygen. CPR was not performed and my lungs were able to resume function on it's own. The crazy thing was, while I was in the pool, fighting for my life, people saw me and they thought I was playing. Someone next to me in the water even said she thought I was just fooling around.

I spent the next couple of days on webmd and medical sites trying to research effects of drowning and my fear was brain damage. Being without air for 3 mins has a very high probability of shutting your brain down and you're basically a vegetable before you die. I was without air for that time but my brain didn't shut down. I saw my doctor the next Monday and his nurses wanted to refuse me from seeing the doctor. They said I needed to go to the emergency room. I had to convince them that I drowned 2 days before and it was sort of too late for an emergency. My doctor even scolded me for going to the deep end when I knew I couldn't swim (he's a Nigerian too so I heard a bit). He gave me some medication to dry out my lungs and what not. He knew not to tell my parents or I would sue him for breaking patient-doctor confidentiality. I told my parents, I fell in and took a gulp and the drugs were just as a precaution. My dad laughed at me, if only he knew how close I was on knocking on heaven's door.

My parents still don't know the real and full details to this day, I plan on telling them though, when my mum won't freak out. I've since gotten a Bachelor's degree, started my Masters program, broken up with that girlfriend and done a lot of other things (mostly good) and so again, I have to say THANK YOU JESUS!!!

There's still one more saga in this series, the testimony never finish. I'm about start the script for Great Escape III - The Rear Endings.


Ibiluv and Mz. Dee, I hope you guys get first and second comments.

Great Escape I - The Rollover

So I got a new car 2 weeks ago and of course, I had to have insurance on the car so I called up good ol' GEICO (US residents know who they are) and requested a quote. The rep then asked me about any previous accidents and I said yeah, I have a couple. Well, I ended up listing 3 accidents (only 1 was my fault o) and that got me thinking on how fortunate I've been to have escaped death numerous times. It turned out that for the past 4 years, I've had a great escape every year, so I've decided to come and share my testimonies with you.

First, help me thank God that I survived this past week. My familique ended up going to Disney for like 5 days so I've been catching up on my sleep, movies and games. Aahhhhh, peace at last, well, till Wednesday when they return for another couple of days.

Okay, to the real thing. I'll start with the first one: June 2004; father's day.
My dad used to have this SUV (or 'jeep' as those kind of cars are called in naija) - Isuzu Trooper. The car was nice and all, moved well and being a car enthusiast, I made sure that car was on point; washed, tires shining, interior sparkling. Well, this Sunday, all that wouldn't count. My mom, my sister and I went to church, did church and headed back home with me driving. Our route back home included us taking a highway with a speed limit of 70mph (about 115kmh). We were in the middle of this wooded highway, cruising along at 72mph in the fast lane when I observed that one of the tires on the driver's side was sounding and feeling somehow.

I told my mom that one of the tires was not sounding too good. She just said take it easy, we'll let your dad know and get it checked out. Being careful, I decided to drop to the slow lane and reduced my speed. I looked in the outside passenger mirror and I saw a car beside me so I decided to slow down some more and let the car pass so I can get in the slow lane. At that point, it seemed as if that car was slowing down too because it wouldn't pass me. I believe I had dropped to about 50mph (about 80kmh) by now because I actually looked at the speedometer. Then I heard the noise - BANG!!!

"I'm still in the fast lane, the road is about to curve to the right, the dividing median is just grass, no guard rails, the left rear tire has just blown and the car is seriously pulling to the left, I need to keep this car steady and get it to stop". These were the thoughts going through my head when I heard that sound. The car started pulling to the left towards the median and oncoming traffic and I was trying to steer the car to the right to keep it straight while gently applying the brakes. My sister who was reading a novel in the back thought I was playing and started yelling at me to stop fooling around. My mum who realized what was going on was calling on Jesus, me? I had my two hands on the wheel, looking straight and calculating all sort in my head, because at this point the road was beginning to curve to the right which means I'll have to turn the wheel right twice as much - to keep the car from pulling left and to make the car follow the curve.

I was doing good. I had controlled the car for almost a mile but I think I was more focused on keeping the car steady than stopping the car. I had my foot off the gas but I don't think I was pressing the brake hard enough. Of course, I didn't want to slam the brakes either. At the middle of the curve, the car took a violent jerk to the left which led me to return fire and forcefully turn the wheel right. I wanted to avoid a head on collision at all costs. That turn of the wheel sent the car in an acute right turn and next thing I know, the two right wheels come off the ground and the car lands on it's side and the rumble began.

It was the loudest noise I had ever heard. I was quiet throughout but my mum was still calling Jesus and my sister was still screaming. A million thoughts crossed my mind. I was worried about flying glass cutting my neck and me bleeding out. I could hear everybody else screaming so they are alive but the rumble wasn't over. We were being slammed over and over again. I opened my eyes and I saw glass and dust particles flying around, I closed them again. " Please don't let us land upside down", I prayed and then it got quiet except for the radio still playing gospel music. The engine had shut off. I opened my eyes and looked around. My mum called me and I answered, my sister was wailing in the back. What just happened? There's a bunch of trees right in front of the car and we are on the grass. Thankfully, we landed back on all four wheels or at least what was left of it.

I opened the door and I saw people reaching out and asking if I was fine. I still didn't understand what just happened. "Sit down", "take a seat", everyone kept saying but I wanted to know what happened. "Your truck just rolled over", someone said. "How many times?", I asked. "A lot, about 8 times", someone answered. I felt dizzy, I was staggering. People tried to grab me but I wanted to be left alone, I just crashed my dad's car. Damn!!!

I walked around and my sister was on the floor with one of her toes bleeding. The cops came and the ambulance followed. The fire truck was pulling up also. Cars were lined up on both sides of the road. People were crossing 4 lanes of traffic from the other side to come to our aid. That car was banged up. It looked like someone took a huge hammer and just started beating on the car, but I was fine. All I had were some scratches on my left hand. My sister cut her toe and my mum had no physical injuries. She later had issues from her sternum being compressed by the impacts of the car hitting the ground and I found out later that I had a much milder situation also but we were alive. We all wore our seat belts which held us down. My bible was in the back seat and only my window was shattered. Well, I picked up my bible about 700ft from where our car stopped. The window that was blown out was held together by the tint film and I picked that up even farther out.

Next to where our car came to rest were 3 erected crucifixes which meant 3 people died there. I took a look and it was fresh. I could still the tracks of the car that plowed into those trees, I even saw the glass from that car. I drive by that spot very often now and each time I'm thankful. We didn't need the fire truck or the ambulance. The police wrote their report and the car was towed away. We all survived the accident in a spot that had just claimed 3 lives. I don't like SUVs anymore due to their high chances of a rollover but He that watches over me neither sleeps nor slumbers. I know because I've had more close calls over the next couple of years but I'm still here.

Coming soon: Great Escape II - The Drowning